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Batman Should Have Been a Black Guy

Like most kids from my generation (the kids of the kids of the WW2 generation), I grew up watching reruns of shows that my parents watched as kids. Batman came to mind this morning as a completely lame show. Remember the son of Dr. Evil from Austin Powers? He was right–why are you tying those guys up in a room and leaving so they can come up with their brilliant (and lame) escape? Just pop a cap in the head and be done with it. But you know what would have made Batman–the character–way better than he was or is? That’s right–a Black Batman. Look at Adam West

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He seems like a studly guy from the 50s that you would want to take your daughter to the prom, but a crime-fighting mofo? No way. And check out the “dynamic duo”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(are these costumes even serious?)

These characters do not look tough at all. How are they supposed to be super fit, quick, and face-bashingly good at stopping real crime? That’s why Batman should have been a Black dude from the beginning, like this guy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(oh yeah)

Now this guy would have made a great Batman, especially back in the 60s in the original series. Remember the movie Blade? That was Wesley getting back at us.

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Revision to Mazlow’s Hierarchy of Needs

(Quite an array of needs.)

 

My life seems unfulfilled. I have only been able to satisfy the most rudimentary needs, Mazlow. Excretion? Check. Breathing? Check. Food, Sex, and Sleep? On good days. Other needs are just out of reach: Security, Employment, Health, and Property. What a sad state I’m in. Friendship and Family? Does my wife count? Sexual Intimacy? You mean, there is such a thing different from sex? I must be top-heavy, the hierarchy is out of whack, because the top two categories I feel the most comfortable with. So the pyramid is not the proper shape for these needs, but instead a wheel.

Belated Debate Thread

The wife and I watched most of the debate before moaning and drifting off to sleep.
Romney clearly “won” the debate, but since, according to Romney, it’s not about winning or losing, I’m not sure what to say about the result.
Two character flaws: Romney’s creepy doll stare, and Obama’s hesitation and looking down, like some ashamed child.

The moderator, Jim Lehrer, was helpless between the two. At the outset of the debate, neither Obama nor Romney were on point or brief. They used up way too much time giving their stump speeches rather than talking on point. In other words, it really wasn’t a debate in the scholastic sense of the term. In a real debate you aren’t allowed to go over your time (correct me if I’m wrong) and you are scored for your responses to questions and rebuttals. This was just plainly two candidates fighting over airtime, and Obama looked tired.

Suggestions for the candidates:

Romney, I’m not sure why you think that smirk is going to work with the American public. You are staring at the President of the US with a stare that says, “I am openly being disrespectful to you.” Be a little more solemn next time. Good work on developing some talking points for people that haven’t paid attention to you–they won’t know the difference between Campaign Romney and Debate Romney.

Obama, What the hell is wrong with you? Before the debate I thought, “This is going to be no-contest. Obama is a lawyer and professor with years of debate experience.” You were like a kid that was sent to the corner for being bad. Stay on point with the moderator, keep to your time, and act like a friggin president. Watch your opponent as he is talking. Forget about all the debate preparation–you have had years of experience to put to use. Take some vitamin B 12 before the next debate.

More Myths About Job Hunting Debunked

(Look how impressed she is with what this guy just told her about his company.)

Let’s be honest here folks; there is a bunch of nonsense on the internet about how to get a job. Most of it is put out by people who have experience looking at other people’s resumes and interviewing, but very little of it is from people that actually make hiring decisions. Reason? Because people that make hiring decisions are all very different people, and there is no recipe for getting a job. They either like you, or they don’t, and very rarely is it because you are the most qualified, skilled candidate. Human resources, on the other hand, is a group of people with a homogeneous mindset. They have general rules and criteria for weeding out and selecting candidates based on corporate policies or prejudices about what makes someone employable or unemployable.

Every so often I come across a bit of wisdom on the internet about how I should present myself to a company; how I should present my experience, education, dates, names, places, etc. And usually I come across a bit of trash. For example, the idea that I should be truthful with a potential employer is ridiculous. Case in point, and this story comes from a reliable source, is when you have gotten fired from your previous job for no good reason. The story goes like this:

A young Engineer was hired by a small company and tasked with designing a structure. But since the Engineer was unlicensed and no permits were obtained by the company, the Engineer was in violation of all of the ethics she was taught during College. Instead of just quitting, however, she informed the authorities of the project, and was later fired by her employer. The employer make it look like the reason for termination had nothing to do with the real reason, so she was basically out of a job and had no legal recourse.

Now imagine that the Engineer is seeking future employment. Human resources people will tell you that she should be up front about her previous situation. She should, they say, come right out and tell them everything. Then, when the previous employer is contacted for a reference, he really won’t be believed if he says something negative, because of the awful position that he placed his employee in. Hogwash. What will happen is that she will be immediately disqualified for the position. They may string her along, but eventually she will get one of those “we decided to pursue other candidates that more closely match our needs” letters.

Think about it this way. You have interviewed 12 people for a position. They are all relatively similar in experience and education. Some have highlighted important skills for the position. Some had personalities that wouldn’t fit in your organization’s culture. Some were too old, and some were too young. But there was this one who said her previous employer coerced her into doing something unethical, and she was eventually terminated for refusing to cooperate. Do you see the problem? No one from the HR department will pass this person along to the hiring manager. It’s too much of a risk and potential liability. There are too many doubts swirling in the mind.

What the Engineer should do is simply say that she was let go. “Laid-off” is the correct terminology I believe. When HR contacts the previous employer, he will not be very forthcoming with his information. He may even only give dates of employment, which is a win for the job-seeker. See how much more easier it is to not be truthful? The truth is complicated and hard for people to swallow. A good story, on the other hand, is made to be easy to digest.

Bad (Good) Advice for Job Seekers

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(This picture annoys me.)

What a great time we live in–for those of us who can afford it. As part of my contribution to our society I want to offer some job search advice for the uninitiated, or those that may have “given up” looking for work. By the way, how do they figure someone has “stopped looking for work.” That doesn’t make any sense to me. You lost your job and looked for while and then just stopped? How do you plan on eating? My intuition tells me everyone would like to be happy and that having food is a prerequisite, but my intuitions have been wrong before.

In any case, here are some tips for the would-be job seeker based on my experience with interviewers and job postings.

  1. Update your resume. How are you going to explain to the interviewer that the resume you submitted for the job didn’t have your most recent influential contributions to collating copies and acting as a middle-man between the customer and your boss? Put that all-important stuff on your resume now! Also, try some trendy stuff like company logos and other things that don’t have anything to do with your abilities–hiring managers love that.
  2. Contact your references. What are you going to do when they call one of your references and she says, “Who?” You have to call your references for the 20th time so they don’t forget you and take time out of their busy schedule to give your prospective employer your dates of service to the Company.
  3. Tailor your cover letter to the specific position. Sure, you send out like 50 cover letters a week, but so what? Tailor all of them to each of the positions you are applying for so that the human resources person doesn’t get in trouble with her supervisor, who gets yelled at by the hiring manager for putting resumes on his desk without any meaningful cover letter that makes him feel important before you’re even hired.
  4. Offer oral pleasure to your current employer. Sometimes, just being an honest, hardworking employee at a company that doesn’t care about you isn’t enough. You need that extra something so your current employer will give you a glowing recommendation. Unemployed? Forget about it, you don’t have a chance with this economy.

Try these tips–they’ve worked for me. I also offer career advice on my blog here like 24/7.

 

UC Davis Admissions Requirements

After settling a lawsuit brought by students pepper-sprayed by university police, Administrators at UC Davis have instituted new requirements for new students seeking admission to the University. The new requirements include signing a waiver in case of future pepper-spray incidents.

“We think this is the best course of action for healing our community,” said President P.B. Katehi, “These new requirements will prevent future students from damaging our reputation.”

The students involved in the incident will be awarded 30,000 dollars each, all of which will be taken back by the University this year in tuition and fee costs.

 

 

 

Question time: is sex a commodity?

We Americans seem to have such great proclivity towards shame. A great insulating barrier is required to protect us from it–marriage. It’s permission to obtain a sexual partner, often, in exchange for a substantial dowry. A new Benz, perhaps?

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See this ring? It says I’m owned by my spouse.

On the other side of things we have prostitution. Here we have open exchange of sex for money, drugs, or anything else. Why is this illegal? Well, because while sex is a commodity, society doesn’t wan’t to see it that way. It penetrates our insulating barrier.

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Like marijuana and alcohol, prostitution should be regulated. How can we have legalized prostitution in Las Vegas, legalized pot in California, and legalized alcohol everywhere, but for the vast majority of Americans, these things (with the exception of booze) are off-limits? Because we have a proclivity towards shame, and the more shameful of us, the self-righteous, seem to have sway over a great many things that we are allowed to do.